Traveling solo!

My initial plan for Thailand was to go solo—a true lone wolf adventure. But thanks to budget constraints, I found myself solo in a group trip instead. Yes, I joined a bunch of strangers and ended up learning, laughing, and building connections with people much older than me. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine exploring Thailand with a crew aged 40 to 70+. But, life surprises you! It turned out to be a one-of-a-kind experience for someone who loves observing and learning from people of all walks of life.

What It’s Like Traveling with a Group of Strangers

I’ll admit it: strangers intimidate me. Admiring people from a distance? Love it. Interacting with them? Terrifying. Yet, I let my curiosity always wins. What kind of group would I share this trip with? How awkward would it be? Spoiler alert: very.

Two days before the trip, the anxiety kicked in hard. I couldn’t sleep, my heart was racing, and I kept wondering how I’d fit in. At the airport, my brother and I couldn’t stop laughing at my “assorted” group of co-travelers. It was like a retirement club had planned a Thailand takeover. There were retired couples, old friends, and jovial old men—all enjoying their post-work freedom. For a moment, I wondered if Thailand was secretly the destination for retirees. Oh, and let’s not forget the two solo travelers giving off seriously creepy vibes. I got a serious warning from my gut whenever I saw them.

Thankfully, there were two families one couple in their 40s and there was a another with a mom in her 40s and two sons (22 and 24). Younger than me but still close enough to my age. Bonus: I looked like the youngest one in the group. Short girl perks.

Breaking The Ice

As we started exploring Pattaya, sharing meals, and sightseeing, an invisible bond began to form. Most of the group was from South India, so things weren’t too chaotic. I kept my interactions polite and surface-level because, as a solo female traveler, drama is the last thing I want. But despite my cautious approach, I slowly began to feel at ease. Whereas, during the time in Bangkok, they started to understand they can’t just force me to their way.

Adjusting to the group’s slower pace was challenging, but it gave me a chance to soak in their stories and perspectives. Their zest for life was contagious, and I couldn’t help but admire their energy.

Navigating Social Dynamics with an Older Group

When men gather—regardless of age—I tend to keep conversations minimal. I have heard and unfortunately seen “locker room conversations” accidentally in my life. And I am always have an idea of what they are capable of. With this group of men at my father’s age, I maintained a composure by stucking small talk and steered clear of anything personal. That said, even though we had least interactions, they were unexpectedly sweet oftentimes, cheering me on during parasailing and flashing big smiles and thumbs-ups whenever I ventured out alone.

Of course, no group trip is complete without a little drama. One middle-aged solo traveler couldn’t keep his mouth shut, which led to an epic bus fight—a memory I’d rather forget. Let’s face it: group trips and drama are like bun and butter.

The older couples were casual. They found me “normal” (probably a rare feat in their families) and were both impressed and baffled by my solo adventures as a woman. Some even admitted feeling a little jealous of my youthful spontaneity. Ah, the perks of being the daring, “younger-looking” one!

As one of the youngest member of the group, I often found myself in the role of an observer and learner. I have previously been travelled with a group like this before but, my brother was there with me at that time and one more guy. Looking back, it is also a similar pack. I remember them treating us like orphans. In the beginning one of the old man asked me to change seat in the flight so that he can sit and talk with his friends. It wasn’t a big deal as I was traveling solo anyways. But in my past group trip to North India, people tend to split me and my brother, fun fact those people are not strangers but my dad’s colleagues. Comparatively, if I look back now, strangers are much more better that people we know. Verdict is, this group of people haven’t made me feel like I am someone who can be taken advantage of, not even a single time.

These older travelers has wealth of knowledge, had wealth of experiences and stories to share, which made for fascinating conversations. Since I was a kid, I never seen myself or imagined myself as an adult.

An adult with a normal life always feels like a far fetched happening for me, never a cup of my tea, as I was always a misfit. Imagining my life in 60+ wasn’t on my list either.

Observing these seasoned travelers made me realize two things:

1. My parents gave up a lot to raise me and my brother, and they deserve a life of their own.
2. I have no excuse not to live my best life, even at 60+.

Their stories and perspectives were eye-opening. Many were far more energetic and positive than I’ve ever been. It’s like they’d rediscovered their inner child, and I couldn’t help but take notes on how I’d want to age gracefully. They seemed that much comfortable with themselves.

When I returned home, I had a heartfelt conversation with my mom, urging her to prioritize her own dreams and start making memories for herself.

Making Friends on the Road

The age difference is a real deal. Still, my mom somehow ended up creating a human who creates a comfortable space for people despite age over conversations. So, I did end up making friends two families during my Thailand trip. I was hesitant in the first. Even though my J factor is strong in my INFJ personality, I disabled the J for a bit. And thats how I ended up making friends. I decided to trust and make conversations. I listened to their stories and they listened to mine. I ended up becoming closer to two families. I ran to them during the inconvenience. These are also the people who kept me less lonely.

One is the couple in their late 40s who eventually took up the role of protecting me. Not sure why, probably they have a son in early 20s. And they saw him in me. Next is the mother and her two young sons in their mid 20s. The eldest son, became my best buddy without doubt, we hung around alot. Plus, we both were in a similar situation. Quit our Job and Travelling in Thailand without ounce of regret.

It was just 5 days still I saw how casually they developed a strong bond with ease, they started supporting each other on a personal level and structured a future for that friendship developed over a short period. From celebrating one of the young man’s 24th birthday to sharing each other’s pain. I saw warmth and love that still people carries. Yes, when you travel, you see that world is full of different types of people.

There are also people with the dirtiest minds that taints with negative emotions at whatever it touches in a world that has people with the purest thoughts that can heal the broken world. Looking at them gave me a hope that there are still people who choose to be more good and do more good even though they have the option to the opposite even though they aren’t living a perfect life.

Its more than a month, but still, we keep in touch, we care about us and hoping to make new plans.

Lessons from Group Travel

1. Embrace Differences: Traveling with people from various backgrounds and age groups reminded me that everyone has a unique perspective to offer. We may not have had the same tastes, but everyone’s stories were valuable in their own way.
2. Patience is Key: Group travel requires compromise. Sometimes, we had to wait longer for a group member or adjust the schedule. These moments taught me patience which I don’t have while travelling.
3. Appreciate Small Moments of Solitude: During group travel, I carved out small moments to recharge, like taking a few minutes to myself before joining the group for breakfast. It kept me grounded and reminded me of my solo travel roots.

Group Travel with Strangers: Advantages and Challenges

Group travel is a mix of benefits and obstacles, especially as a solo traveler. Here are some of the advantages and challenges I faced:

Advantages

• Safety in Numbers: Especially comforting in unfamiliar places.
• Cost-Saving: Shared transportation and expenses.
• Built-In Companionship: You’re never truly alone, which helps combat loneliness.

Challenges

• Limited Flexibility: You can’t always follow your own itinerary. Some days I wished we could linger longer at a location.
• Adjusting to Different Personalities: Group travel comes with varying personalities and preferences, which can sometimes lead to friction.
• Slower Pace: Since some group members preferred a slower pace, I occasionally had to adapt to ensure we all stayed together. But that’s too hard for me. I hate it. Cause my travelling style is quite different. I like to see and experience more compared to doing shoppings.

In the end, this experience was something I was meant to have. Traveling with a diverse group taught me about patience, empathy, and the beauty of human connections. And hey, now I know retirement can look pretty damn fun as long as you have money.