For a long time I lived under the weight of a sentence that said I wouldn’t make it past my nineteenth birthday. Yet here I am. Two weeks ago on March 18th I crossed into twenty nine.

This milestone feels less like a simple birthday and more like a victory lap I was never supposed to run. The “Baton” is finally being passed from the girl who just wanted to survive to the woman who is ready to sprint.

The Quicksand of Ambition

This past year was a brutal teacher. I found myself dragged back to a rock bottom that felt physical, spiritual, and mental. I started listening to my brain more and my heart less while making career decisions. I let ambition become a kind of quicksand.

My heart became a rat trap because I trusted too easily and gave my authentic self to those who only wanted to manipulate it.

“Not everyone deserves to hear your full story because not everyone cares. Some just want to use it to pull you down.”

The Bhutan Pivot: Silent Growth

After nine months of being trampled by expectations I went to Bhutan. In that stillness I found myself again. I decided to change how I move through the world. I still give my best. I still make people feel seen and heard. But now once the day is done I go home.

• The Rule: Live without regret. Give your best at work then go home to your peace. Be good, be human, be you.
• The Shift: From a people pleaser to someone who grows in silence.
• The Boundary: No more wearing my heart on my sleeve in the wasteland.

Healing and Small Joys

After the heartbreak of losing Pearly last year a new boy pup – Luffy, came into our lives. He is the reason I look forward to waking up every morning. He has made me calmer. While I am still the girl who runs for friends who are busy in their own bubbles I have quit crying in bathrooms. I have started taking care of myself first.

And I also have a four legged friend who is helping me to barely survive everyday.

Struck From the Bucket List

Despite the chaos I made sure to live. This year was a whirlwind of new memories and striking things off the list:

• Saw fireflies for the first time and summoned the rain on my birthday.
• Went to Bhutan
• Went for Solo Camping trip to Jawadhu Hill and Yelagiri
• Went for cycling with a friend
• Relaxed in himalayan river bank
• Did River Rafting and Kayaking
• Experienced minus degree without dying.

Still finding sanctuary in Kurraku and a constant love in Ravioli. Slaying new style while saying a firm no to polyesters as much as possible. Fell in love for new animes – Demon Slayer and Black Clover. Still that emotional kid who hates cruelty. Partially am adult who can finally take care of herself.

Running Toward Thirty

I still rage against unfairness. I still go over mountains for my family and friends. I am still dgaf to a capitalistic society, event though I have to be a Roman when I am in rome.

I still get high on the moon and the music. I am getting better at analytical thinking and breaking past traumas that once felt permanent. I have realized that none care about me more than myself and my family.

As I look toward my thirties I am walking with curiosity and a healthy dose of anxiety. The world might label me as “behind” their standard but I am happy. That is more than enough.

Shout out to the 29yo me. Who is taking the baton from my past self and sprinting and creating a path that I deserve… The best one of anything out there.