Tell us about the last thing you got excited about.

The last thing that got me excited about is the food I savoured in Kuuraku while tears rolled down my cheeks.

Life is always a gamble. If you get something, you’ll lose something. The stakes are different for each of us, and in every game, the wealthier you are, the more opportunities you have. But regardless of where you stand, one truth remains: things will change. And when you choose to prioritize your well-being, as I did when I decided to quit my job to focus on my health, there’s always a cost.

It’s not about being broke but about facing a familiar friend with whome I’ve spent my entire life with but lost touch for a while. —loneliness. Now, after leaving job, I knew that things would change. The calls and messages would dwindle, and the once-frequent check-ins would become a rarity. The “How are you doing?” and “Miss you a lot. Can we meet for a cup of coffee?” would fade into the background.

And it’s not even been a month since I quit, but already, things have shifted as expected. Spending entire days with my parents and dogs has been joyful, and giving my mom a break finally makes me feel like I’m being a good daughter, even if it’s a bit late. But, it is lonely for me.

Today, my parents urged me to go out and meet friends. “Enough working all day on your blog and helping us. Get some air, meet people…” they said. I felt too pathetic to admit that I don’t have anyone who genuinely wants to meet. It’s just me missing people and chasing them. I forced a smile and said, “Aye aye…”

I aimlessly wandered to Vadapalani, to Nexus Vijaya Mall—a place I used to visit when loneliness was my closest friend. I put on my earbuds and started my “Let’s do it” playlist, trying to hold back tears. I watched groups of people, families, couples, and others like me. I took a deep breath.

I asked myself, “What would you do if you were that friend you always wanted?”

Kuuraku, a Japanese restaurant I’d been eyeing for a while, suddenly came to mind. It’s a bit pricey—very expensive, actually, for someone like me. But I knew I was on the verge of breaking down, so I made my way to Green Park Hotel, where Kuuraku is located.

The restaurant, tucked away in the basement, felt like a den for lost, lonely souls. The entire staff greeted me warmly—a rare smile spread across my face for the first time that day. I asked for a table for one, and they pointed me to a bench facing the kitchen—perfect for someone like me.

As I went through the menu, I ordered miso chicken soup, grilled dumplings, and Annin Tofu for dessert. A sadness clutched my heart, and my eyes welled up. When the soup arrived, the piping hot broth felt like a balm, comforting and healing me from the inside. As I sipped, a tear rolled down my cheek, mixing with the toner and moisturizer I applied while leaving home, toning down the loneliness that had been gnawing at me all day.

Next came the grilled dumplings. The first bite burned my lips, but I welcomed the heat. I dipped them in sauce, savoring the burst of flavor that momentarily filled the emptiness inside me.

Finally, the Annin Tofu arrived, its almond flavor layered with a sweet mango extract. I love desserts, not because I always have, but because they became my solace when food was too hard to swallow. Desserts glide down effortlessly, and I’ve grown obsessed with their unique flavors. As I took the first spoonful, my eyes teared up again, but this time, I was happy. Happy that I brought myself here, that I love myself enough to do this. I savored every bit of the Annin Tofu.

After paying the bill (Around Rs 800🤧), I tossed a katcha mango bite into my mouth, and with Fuji Kaze’s “Grace” playing in my Spotify, I walked out with a flood of thoughts.

“It is what it is. Or maybe I’m a bit unlucky. Or perhaps I’m looking for someone like me, who I might never meet. But I’ve grown so much from who I used to be. Back then, I gave so much to others and never got the love back or never gave myself the love I needed. But I never regretted crossing oceans and hills for the people I love. A part of me still longs for that kind of love.”

But now, I’ve grown into an adult who knows how to make myself better, who knows how to love myself so that I’m not left out. And for now, that feels like more than enough.

While I was typing this in the bench outside Airport metro, a line from OneRepublic’s “Counting Stars” played in my head: “Everything that kills me makes me feel alive.”

It was at that moment I realized that loneliness has never truly left me. It has always been there, a part of me. Now, I’ve renamed it “solitude”—a companion who will stay by my side forever.

If you find yourself walking a similar path, remember this: You are stronger than you think. Life is a series of unexpected turns, and while loneliness may be a constant companion, so is your ability to love yourself. Yes, everyone around you not lives the same life as you. But, I want you to continue to nurture that love you have for yourself and others, and one day, life will surprise you with more than you ever thought you deserved. Stay strong, keep loving yourself, and trust that brighter days are ahead.

The day started with melancholy, but I must say I enjoyed every moment while savoring the Japanese delicacies offered at Kuuraku and it added a little bit of excitement that I have been missing throughout the week.