Do you need a break? From what?

We humans are social beings—we hear this very often. It’s presented as a justification for coexistence and community building. I still remember this ideology being continuously emphasized in my value education classes. The idea was that humans should stick together to thrive in the bounds of nature, to foster relationships, and to evolve as a society and community.

However, this ideology has come at a price. We are often bound by the thought process of, “What would they think of me if I do this?” In many instances, this mindset can be beneficial. Without it, we can only imagine how many men and women might have let their inner demons run wild by now. But on the flip side, it has stifled the authenticity of many people and prevented them from fully exploring their true potential.

How many times have we seen our parents hesitate to do something—something they truly want to do or something that would benefit us—simply because they are concerned about what others might think of them? In moments like these, the influence of “they”—those who are not directly part of our closest circle but somehow impose taboos on our liberty—feels overwhelming.

In simpler terms, we’ve handed over significant control of our life decisions to random people around us. Some days, we care too much about what others think, and other days, we prioritize others’ happiness and comfort over our own.

I’ve noticed this pattern in myself as well. Some days, another person’s behavior towards something I’ve done impacts me deeply. I let it control my life—consciously or unconsciously. If someone behaves rudely, why do I take it personally and blame myself for their actions? Why can’t I be kind enough to myself and stop justifying another person’s behavior?

It sucks, doesn’t it? But I’ve started listening to an audiobook recently, and funnily enough, it has begun helping me unlearn this pattern I’ve been struggling to break free from.

I know it’s not easy to be carefree. I’ve seen people who have mastered the art of being truly free. By “free,” I mean being completely detached from others’ opinions—good or bad. It doesn’t mean deflecting them entirely; it means reaching a point where you stop labeling opinions as good or bad and perceive them as raw statements. You either use them or discard them without attaching any emotions to them.

To be free… to be reckless… as a means of staying true to my values. That is the way of life I aspire to. Just like characters such as Luffy and Nishinoya.

After all, we have just one life, so why should we let others control our happiness, sadness, or any other aspect of our emotional state?

In the past five months, I’ve noticed significant changes in myself. But I can see that I still have a long way to go in breaking free from the shyness, hesitation, fear, and anxiety that often stem from the thought: “What if they…”

Strangely, I have this gut feeling that the day I fully break free from this cycle isn’t far away.